Home

I know everybody has a story to tell about "home," some are more frightening than my own, but I fear my family home more than anything. I lived in this house until the age of 17, then everyone moved out (divorce; broken home story). Anyway, now, a college student near graduation, I have matured enough to not feel angry about my past life. Instead, I now feel afraid.

My mother and I went back one day to check out the house, and noticed that the deck was rotting, the grass was long, the metal trimmings (indoor and outdoor) are rusted; just the subject of an abandoned home. Upon entering the house, there is an old crucifix that no one has ever taken down. House flies litter the window ledges.

There is an energy there, something that hasn't left the house at the same time as we have. I noticed that when my family and I go inside, our attitudes shift to anger. Feelings totally out of character.

One day, I returned home alone to see what this energy was, and noticed that front window blinds were open, but it looked dark inside (unusual). So I went inside as I normally would. No physical person was in the house, but as I entered the laundry room, which was my parents room at one time, I began to cry uncontrollably. The tears subsided when I started looking at our old belongings. I put on an old CD and started cleaning the living room and kitchen. When I was finished and the stereo was off, I heard a creaking in the hallway. As I looked down, I saw my own reflection in the middle at the end, and noticed that I was pale-skined and my eyes were a different colour. (Im a fair toned man with dark brown eyes). At this point, I knew it was time to leave. As I checked in with my neighbours, they asked me why I was there so long. They said I was there for about 4 hours, when it only felt like 1.

I don't know what is in my old house, but I know that the greed that fuels my familys past battle for ownership has consumed it and rotted it beyond high retail value. Perhaps we left something behind when my family of four left, angry, frustrated, alone, ..hateful.